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    You know that creepy-ass feeling when it feels like there is something there, but there isn't? It usually happens at night, late at nigh, when you're trying to fucking sleep. Then you wrap the blankets tight around yourself and tell yourself that it's just in your head. Then you have to take a piss. OH MY GOD! Those first steps out of your bathroom are like walking to the gallows. You just know that some fucker is going to jump you. then, you drain the dragon and haul ass back to your bed, and hide yourself from the things that go bump in the night.

    -JAKE


 

My Shoes

01/07/2013

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Are too big...

    -Coll!n

 
 
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THE NEW WEBSITE THEME! LOVE IT? HATE IT? TELL US PLZ!

 
 
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Do you know in Harry Potter, how Ron Weasly never gets attacked by Dementors? It's because he's ginger, and has has no soul!

      - Casey

 
 




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Okay, so what the fuck happened to the smiley face, and when?  It just suddenly became some sort of "pop" texture. WTF?! My theory is that the smiley face guy just spontaneously popped one day, and the Walmart guys were all like, "hey, the smiley popped!" and another dude was all like, "whatever, let's keep using him, but make it seem like we have a new logo!" seriously, I liked that happy bastard! Especially when I was a kid! people would just hand you a random sticker made out of this guy's face! Now what are they going to use for stickers? the new logo? Because, somehow, I don't think that would be as cool as a face-sticker.
    -Jake

 

Trollout

11/27/2012

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Okay, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?! Every time I battle Whitney, everything goes fine until I battle her FUCKING MILTANK! This shit is so annoying, it's like Justin Bieber stuck in my FUCKING HEAD! Yeah, I don't care if I spelled Bieber right or not, I could really give less shits. That's not what this is about, it's about Whitney's FUCKING MILTANK! It fucking SUCKS! "Miltank used rollout, Mewtwo fainted!" FUCK! Not to mention, that fucking piece of shit knocks out your entire team, and you're left with the misfits, suck as Weedle, or Rattata, usually both at level 5 or some bullshit. You know they ain't gonna stand a chance, but you charge on, because you're badass. It took me over a week to grind up, and then beat this sonofabitch the first time i played Gold and Silver back in 2002. Bitches will be bitches, and Miltanks will be Miltanks.

    -Jake


 
 
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Rushing down to open the door for my friend Natalie, I stop briefly to look in a mirror. Black hair in a mess and eyes the color of a gravestone, unprepared and eager for an adventure. The bell rings again and I make a mad dash for the door grabbing our picnic basket on the way. Today is Natalie’s birthday and she suggested we have a picnic in the park for lunch. Copper hair, emerald eyes and a warm smile greet me at the door.

“Are you ready to go Lance?”, Natalie asks.

As we head out to the park my father yells a happy birthday to Natalie out the basement window and we make our way through town to the park. The lush green park was bustling with activity, children playing on the play sets while their parents watched, the elderly sitting on the benches along the walk were talking about “the glory days”, people playing with their pets, and the birds chirped happily in the bright sun.

Our destination was the pond in the center of the park, this was the first place we met and we both agreed that it was the best place to have a picnic. There was a pleasant breeze blowing as we set up to eat lunch, it was a soft, warm spring breeze. About a minute later that pleasant breeze turned into a forceful gust of wind that sent our lunch flying into the pond. A loud explosion reverberated throughout the town and a mushroom cloud loomed ominously over the center of town. After that everything went black.

Coming soon: The rest of my story! Maybe. . .

-Alex Nelson



 

Weedle

11/19/2012

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why does Weedle get shit on by the Pokemon community? Weedle is the original bad-ass, killin'-Caterpies-since-1996, awesome dude. Sure, Weedle has it's weak points (many of them), but deep down, Weedle could kick anybody's ass! think about it? Schoolyard bully? BITCH I GOT A BIG POISONOUS BUG! Parents driving you crazy? LOL, POISON STING! WHAT, I RAN OUT OF ANTIDOTES? FUCK! yeah, okay, against pretty much ANY other pokemon, Weedle is useless, but in the real world, Weedle would P4WN N00BZ. Weedle is just all-around amazing in my book! That is why he's  my bro!

    -Jake


 
 
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wow this video sucked huge-ass balls. mostly because Jason's acting sucked. My directing and editing was flawless! okay, so there could have been more lighting and better audio, but all in all, this whole mess could have been avoided if Jason got acting lessons...

    -Jake


 
 
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You know what I never got? The ending to Modern Warfare 3! The Russian guy, Yuri is supposed to be this amazing, awesome, warrior guy, right? WRONG! first, let's go over some context: you and Yuri are fighting, right? then some shit explodes, and he goes through a long ass pipe! So there you are, people shooting at you, with Yuri impaled by a god damn pipe! then he tells you to go chase after Baddy (can't remember his name) instead of helping him, so you chase after Baddy. then, once Baddy has you pinned after you trip or some shit, Yuri comes out of nowhere and starts shooting wildly in the general direction of Baddy. then Baddy fires one shot and kills Yuri. WTF, right? Then you wrap some shit around Baddy's neck, and you both fall through the ceiling. So Yuri's dead, Baddy's hangin' out, and you're falling 100 feet DOWN! so you crash land on the fucking floor, and look up at Baddy hangin' there. All of a sudden, you pull a mother fucking cigar out of your ass, and start smoking it. WTF! does he always keep a cigar in his pocket? that's fucking weird! anyway, that's the ending of Modern Warfare 3.

    -Jake